Week 18

Brompton Ralph – Away

My first away game of the season which also doubled up as my last away game of the season as it was the last game of the season, well the league season anyway. I do like travelling away, so this season has been disappointing as I only made one away trip – oh how I hate rain.

The game can only be remembered for comments made by the Stowey fielders when defending a low total. Dan likes to go down on one knee and Adrian was comparing sweating to a disgraced celebrity.

Enough said of that. Stowey lost and are officially the strongest side in the West Somerset League, as they are holding up the rest. A well organised Brompton side was always on the front foot, right from the first ball and if Rabbit didn’t score 43 the game would off been over sooner.

So what are my highlights of the 2014 season? Well not much to be frank. So here are some:

• Carl’s match report v Lydeard St Lawrence
• Matt Coombes’ 97 v Fitzhead
• Julian losing his way going to LSL
• The every improving Lee Rich, he must be the leading wicket taker in the 2nds.
• Stephen Miller making the step from Under 15’s to senior cricket and in some matches showing the seniors how to play!
• Generally being a very sporting division to umpire in, especially as it is my first full season as an umpire. Oh no, Bishops Hull are coming down!

In all the games I umpired, I only had to give the following decisions:

• 3 x LBW’s – please know the laws before you appeal, but that doesn’t mean I’m right!
• 2 x run outs (both in the same game)
• 2 x caught behinds to faint nicks

That is apart from boundaries, wides and no balls which is part and parcel in any umpires book. I am very happy with my first full year, but something happened on Sunday which was brought to my attention. Apparently there has been a rule change in Law 42 – fair and unfair play.

But when I looked it up when I got home on the MCC Laws of Cricket website nothing has been changed, it clearly still states:

(b) Bowling of high full pitched balls

(i) Any delivery, other than a slow paced one, which passes or would have passed on the full above waist height of the striker standing upright at the popping crease is to be deemed dangerous and unfair, whether or not it is likely to inflict physical injury on the striker.

(ii) A slow delivery which passes or would have passed on the full above shoulder height of the striker standing upright at the popping crease is to be deemed dangerous and unfair, whether or not it is likely to inflict physical injury on the striker.

Though I whole heartedly agree with Jub in how do you define a slow delivery, I still think I was right in not giving a no ball. But hey, if someone can tell / show me different I will accept that, but I did get the above from the MCC website and that is what I have been taught. Is it a local rule to the West Somerset League?

Right, enough of that, the Under 30’s v the Over 30’s. For once the oldun’s won, by the narrowest of margins and Mark Sortwell got bowled by an 11 year old, well bowled Kieran, shame your dad caught you out.

Other good news is that Nosworthy has gone (hurrah) and Australia lost to Zimbabwe (double hurrah!). SMS will return next week, but now it is Thatchers time.

Week 17

Fitzhead – Home

With the fear in getting a verbal lashing from Carl, I did not ask him for a match report from Saturday’s game. Even though the players enjoyed the read – see week 16 - Carl did expect some editing before it went on the social networks. I did edit it for the written press however!

So Saturday, a full 80 overs of umpiring, that was five hours worth, and if Fitzhead held their catches I am sure it would have been about three hours of adjudicating! Well, thankfully the visitors dropped loads of catches, which enabled Stowey to amass 231 (this is not a typo), yes 231 in 40 overs; Lee Rich ran out his captain in the last over trying to gat a not out and playing for his average!!!

Matt Coombes was the star with the batting scoring 97, which included plenty off four’s and sixes! One six he hit off their spinner was quite amusing; in fact I think the bowler went for a few boundaries that particular over. In handing his jumper to me at the start of the over he realised that he lost his lucky charm, and after he was despatched for 20+ runs, he found it, mumbling to myself “I told you it was lucky!”

It was unfortunate for Matt to get so close to three figures, to be fair he was going for another big shot and got the faintest of edges to the wicketkeeper. I was gutted to give him out caught behind, knowing he was so close to a ton. To be fair afterwards he said he would off walked if I missed it – questioning my ability to umpire Matt?

Another decision I have to give this week was a run out, my first of the season; in fact I gave two, like buses eh? Poor Mark Sortwell, picked the best fielder in the side to run two to, well, he wasn’t even the frame. I don’t mind easy decisions like that to give. LBW’s I hate. You have to think off at least four things before you can come to a decision and when the ball hits the pad the rest is just guess work.

When the Fitzhead opening bowler, (left arm over) appealed, which I subsequently said “not out”, he had the nerve to question my decision (which he has every right to), but not I aggressive manor. “Which of those three stumps was that missing?” he asked. When I replied that the ball pitched outside leg stump and therefore you cannot be out LBW, he shook his head, trudged back to his marker and ran in a bit quicker. The next over the same thing happened, he went to appeal, said not out to him self, went left arm round and after the over asked to change ends!

Lee Rich come of age during the Fitzhead run chase, taking six wickets (his first “Michelle”) and took them at the right time of the innings. Three quick wickets in his opening spell, then another three important wickets when the Fitzhead batsmen showed a lot of fire and was slowly taking the game away from Stowey.

So Stowey won, still mathematically possible not to be bottom, and there was two jugs back the club after. Happy days indeed. Next Brompton, last game of the season, and Brompton need to win to become champions. Looking forward to a drink with Roy after.

Thatchers’ time.

Week 16

Lydeard St Lawrence – Away

The most exciting weekend this season for Over Stowey, and where was I? Sulking, as my Victoria Sponge didn’t get a prize in the local flower show!

So the mighty 2^nd XI travelled to Lydeard St Lawrence and came away victorious. I asked Carl for a match report and this is what he came up with:


Mark, I hope the flower show was worth it, you missed a cracking match to start your tour: Having won the toss Lydeard batted first in a game reduced to 30 overs a side and finished on what should have been a winning 168-7 (M.Redding 55. Julian 5-39). Shit can take wickets because this was the worst I've seen Julian bowl for a very long time. Stephen and Carl both bowled well but didn't have much to show for it, Lee Rich, for a change, had a nightmare and the figures to prove it. 

After tea Stowey lost wickets regularly but scored runs all down the order, with Dan 25, Pikey 34 and Dig holding his nerve and the innings together to win the game with a six with only five balls left and Stowey nine wickets down. A really enjoyable game played between two shit teams who both enjoyed a game that was competitive and played in the right spirit. Shame you missed it not least because I ended up doing a lot of umpiring....I could try batting a bit longer!!!
 

Several points of note Dan and Dig both hit their first sixes in senior cricket, both to the longest part of the ground. Stephen Miller, probable not for the last time, opened both the batting and the bowling. He only opened the bowling because not for the first time Julian got lost and missed the start. Julian then had to leave early and for the second time this season left his boots behind. Never a dull moment in the 2^nd’s.


This victory was not enough to move the 2^nd’s off the bottom of the league, however there are two games remaining against Fitzhead and then away at Brompton – will that be my first away game?

For the first time this season both senior sides won, with the 1^st XI winning against Lydeard 1^st XI, I have been told in despatches that Jack batted well – in fact Jack was the one who told me.

Will that victory be enough to save the 1^st XI from the drop? Will the 2^nd XI avoid the wooden spoon? Will I actually get to umpire an away game? All these question will no doubt be answered over the next few weeks, what an exciting climax to the 2014 season.

Now for a Thatchers or two to calm down my nerves.

Week 15

Crowcombe III – Home

A very enjoyable game indeed, a game played completely in the right spirit, unfortunately the mighty 2^nd’s came second best yet again this season and are now firmly routed to the bottom of the table, as Lydeard St Lawrence won on Saturday.

As a bowler, you set a field to stop a batsman scoring in their favourite areas, hopefully forcing them to make a mistake and then claiming his wicket. One such incident happened on Saturday; unfortunately a Stowey batsman was in the receiving end of such cunning.

Dan Butson was going well, scoring strongly on his leg side and despatching the bad ball for four. The Crowcombe captain decided that a change of bowling was in order, and duly the opening bowler came off, to be replaced by what can only be called a very slow bowler. In setting his field he asked one particular fielder to move back seven paces, not five of 10, just seven, as “you will have a catch in a minute.” The fielder counted out seven paces, the bowler sent down his first delivery, and Dan duly obliged in giving the fielder a catch, in fact he didn’t even have to move, straight to him and out. Much hilarity amongst the away side, poor Dan was completely mystified.

I used to like bowling to Over Stowey’s most prolific batmen Phil Rich, as I would sometimes get him out. It may cost a few sixes, but I would eventually get my man! Phil’s favourite shot is over cow corner or straight over my head. So I would have four fielders protecting these areas, sometime five. The first couple may go out of the ground, but I would try to send a flatter delivery or one with a bit more tweak on it and the mistake would be made, not enough distance and right down the throat of a fielder, the only thing left to do was to catch it!

As I said in my first paragraph, the game was played in completely the right spirit, as one of the Crowcombe players pointed out that Division Five is a real friendly division to be playing cricket in. I didn’t have to give one decision on Saturday, only had to signal four’s, sixes, wides, byes etc.  A sort of game I like. I do have a big issue in giving LBW’s, so not to make any judgement on such decisions on Saturday was a blessed relief. I only ask that the bowlers know the rules, not thinking that if hits the pads its automatically out, the ball may be hitting the stumps, but it is where the ball pitches is the key. Anyway, enough about that.

I did, however, give a back foot no-ball, the first time I have ever done that, and when I explained it to the bowler, it made him slightly bemused; he then bowled the next few overs a bit quicker and he took a few wickets, in fact five in total.

Next Saturday is the big one, a game which will go a long way to see who will have the unfortunate pleasure in getting the wooden spoon, either Over Stowey or Lydeard St Lawrence. With Lydeard winning on Saturday, even victory for Stowey over Lydeard will still mean that Stowey would have to find another win somewhere to get off the bottom of the league.

The game next Saturday is away, and guess what, it looks as if I am going to miss that one, well some of it anyway. So it would just mean I will have one more chance to go away when Stowey play Brompton on the last game of the season. But I have a nagging feeling that I have a wedding to go to that evening.

Ok, it’s Thatchers time.

Week 14

Stoke St Mary – Away

A fixture which has long been in my diary as it would have been my first away game of the season, but it was never to be.

Carl had 12 players available, plus myself as umpire on the Friday evening, and within minutes of him ordering a pint at the Social Club on that Friday he had lost six of them to the 1^st XI. So with half of the 2^nd XI playing for the first team against Carhampton I suppose this sort of counts as week 13, so I may have to change the heading:

Week 13

Carhampton – Home

With a downpour at about an hour before play was due to start it looked unlikely that this match would go ahead, but with the sun beating its ray down on the ground the match started a little after 3pm, with the game reduced to 30 overs.

Carhampton batted first, they scored 123-8, which proved to be too many for Stowey, as they only made 92. The second team players did contribute, scoring some valuable runs at the end and gaining extra bonus points, which could help in the long run.

Anyway, what did that journalist, Martin Johnson, once say about the England touring team to Australia one year, “there are three things fundamentally wrong with the English team: they can’t bat, they can’t bowl and they can’t field.

Well here is some examples form the Charity Six-a-Side weekend recently held at Over Stowey:

 

 Thanks Shane for the pictures, might try a Thatchers or two now me thinks.

Week 13

Hemyock – Away

With any luck the recent 2^nd XI game against Hemyock will be the last game I will miss this season. Admittedly the last three weeks I have missed were unavoidable, but my thoughts were for the Stowey lads taking the field on Saturday, how hot was it?

So what happened last weekend, well the 2^nd XI hit more runs than the 1^st team and they hit more runs than last week, however they still lost, whereas the 1^st team, who scored less, won.

What is evident from the weekend, in fact the whole season, is that Stowey are crying out for a couple of decent batsmen, a couple of guys who can bat through 30+ overs to post a competitive total. There are bowlers a plenty, and the fielders back up the bowlers, albeit the first game of the season when 13 catches were shelled.

Stowey now boast some of the best facilities in the area to play cricket, and with a newly artificial wicket recently installed, everything is there to help, train and improve player’s ability, especially the batting. Somehow my attempt to attract two Taunton Deane players on Friday night at the County Ground was not that successful, even my offer of as much cider as they can drink after the game was a bit futile.

Back to what happened at the weekend. The 2^nd XI batted first, to the relief of Carl no doubt, firstly because it was very hot, and secondly Hemyock is nearly in Devon! A much better performance batting display than the previous week as Stowey almost doubled what they scored against Kilve, amassing 95 runs. Hemyock knocked them off with the loss of only two wickets.

However, trying to pick some positives out of the performance, the Super Two’s picked up three valuable points, moving them off the bottom of the table. So there we have it, three positives from the trip to Hemyock: a better batting display, three points amassed and no longer bottom of the league – things are looking up guys, so who’s next? Ah!!!!!!

Over the weekend there has been some great individual performances and Over Stowey 1^st XI bowler Gary Thomas had exceptional bowling figures in their win against Bridgwater Pointers on Saturday. 3.5 overs bowled, two maidens, four runs and six, yes six wickets taken. Exceptional stuff Gary, surely that makes you favourite to win an award at the presentation night.

Somerset’s James Hildreth and Lewis Gregory dragged Somerset from the jaws of defeat to a very unlikely victory on Sunday against Durham in the 50 over competition. Needing 312 for victory Somerset were 21-3, then 106-5, the home side was staring down a barrel. Gregory joined Hildreth in the middle, and set about smashing the Durham attack all round Taunton. A 70 ball century from Gregory ensured victory for Somerset with 20 balls to spare.

Lewis Gregory can consider himself unlucky not to be picked for the England Lions. 2014 has been a remarkable season for Lewis, taking wickets for fun and now scoring runs, surely his call up is not far away. On that note, congratulations go to Craig Overton in his call up to the Lions squad.

Lastly, well done Somerset, as they will be holding a beer and cider festival during the four day game against Warwickshire later this month. I think I will need a lift in to work those days!

Time for a Thatchers me thinks, with TMS in the background, sitting in the back garden thinking about mowing the lawn.

Week 12

Kilve – Home

Yet another game missed, and to be fair, where I was amongst the thunder and lightning I didn’t think there would be any games played in Somerset, let alone at Over Stowey.

I was in Gloucestershire, enjoying a well deserved break, with the rain coming down like stair rods, not much venturing out was done, only to the local bar. I was very surprised to learn that the mighty 2^nd XI managed to get a game in on Saturday, in fact both Stowey sides played. I am also led to believe that there was nearly a full fixture program in the West Somerset League.

So what happened, well, by the looks at the Stowey score, not a great deal! 56 all out and zero points collected. Ironically Stowey would off picked up more if the game was cancelled, as eight points would off been awarded to both sides. With Stowey picking up no points, Kilve picking up the maximum and other wooden spoon candidates Lydeard St Lawrence gaining six points, Stowey now plummet to bottom of Division Five of the West Somerset League.

Six games left and it looks as if the away game against fellow wooden-spoon candidates, Lydeard St Lawrence, on August 16^th will be the one who decides who collects that wooden thing. But before that there are games against Hemyock, Stoke St Mary and Crowcombe to concentrate on. I am pretty sure that apart from the Hemyock game I am available to umpire for those games in August.

Following up from last week, I have now seen the state of Kieswetter’s eye, wow that looks a mess. Judging by the recent results against Surrey and Kent, Somerset have most definitely missed him – sorry Taylor, the results and the Somerset batting performances show that. He may score at slow rate compared to other T20 opening batsmen, but he does not give his wicket away cheaply, something which other players could learn from, especially that game against Kent. Qualifying for a T20 quarter-final pace is now out of Somerset’s hands. Just concentrate on beating Middlesex first and then we’ll see what happens.

Kieswetter’s injury reminds me of the story about Mike Gatting being hit on his nose by a Malcolm Marshall delivery. His face was an absolute mess, two black eyes, a squat nose and cuts being hidden by plasters. On his return to England, he was asked by a so called reporter, “Where exactly did he hit you?”

Gatting got bowled off his hooter by that delivery from Marshall. I believe the West Indians call that type of delivery a “perfume ball”, a delivery where the batsman can smell the leather. Gatting certainly done that and when the ball was returned to Marshall, the West Indian bowler found a bit of bone lodged in the leather.

As for the reporter, Gatting didn’t reply, as he was a bit bemused by the question. Now if he was quick enough he could off replied “Jamaica!”

For those of you watching the Test match over the past five days you may of noticed that England used a substitute fielder for a bit during India’s first innings. Somerset’s Alex Barrow was on 12^th man duty for England for the Test, which reminds me of another Somerset player who was also on 12^th man duty some nine years ago, and he made a bit of an impact.

James Hildreth was on duty during the first Ashes Test in 2005, and boy did he make an impact, catching skipper Ricky Ponting out. I don’t think Punter was best pleased and he did a bit of a double take to see who caught him, as Hildreth and Ponting were Somerset team mates for a while.

Bad luck Ricky, and on that pleasant note, I think I will have a pint of Thatchers, it is cider time after all.

Week 11

Milverton – Away

With the worlds second most important sporting competition now over, thankfully, we can all now get back to some normality and concentrate on the wonderful sport of cricket. We all know the Ashes is the biggest event in the sporting world, anything else is just secondary and the Ashes is contested for next summer. I wonder who will be captain of England then, just hope it is still Alastair Cook.

Anyway, the mighty two’s travelled to Milverton, for their next Division Five encounter, and another game I missed out on umpiring, and it looks like I’m going to miss the next two Saturday’s as well. Hopefully by then I will have a clear run in until the end of the season.

So what happened on Saturday? Well according Carl they lasted beyond tea this week, only because he chose to field first instead of batting. The home side plummeted the Stowey attack all round Milverton and they ended up scoring in excess of 200 with the loss of only five wickets.

In response Stowey lasted 30 overs before they were all dismissed some 100 runs short, but the game did last beyond 7 o’clock, which is a bit of an achievement for the two’s. At least everyone had a bat and a nearly everyone had a bowl, 14 year old Ryan Thomas top scored, showing the senior players how to bat in testing conditions.

Sunday morning saw Over Stowey’s Under-15’s host their Taunton counterparts, a game which truly showed cricket being played in the right spirit. Tina Miller, Stowey’s Under-15 manager, along with he husband Paul and Under-15 Captain Stephen was frantically trying to get 11 on the field, as Tina had a few who let her down in the morning. Her Taunton counterpart offered Tina three of their players as substitute fielders, plus he also reversed the batting order to make a “game of it.”

I could only witness was pure enjoyment, with a lot of good comradeship between all players. Especially when one of the substitute Taunton fielders caught one of his own side out. Great to see Taunton, you have set a great example to others. Let’s hope other teams follow your example, whatever the steaks may be.

Have you seen the state of Craig Kieswetter’s nose and eye? No nor have I, but I bet it is a mess. I don’t know how long he will be out for, but it is coming to a crucial stage of the season, where the mighty Set are in somewhat precarious type of position. A couple of geed results over the next couple of weeks will put them in the hunt for silverware, on the other hand, well I don’t need to tell you, and I don’t want to think about it.

Alex Barrow will make a great replacement for Craig, not as flamboyant, but very capable. It is also good to hear that Craig has committed himself to Somerset, by extending his current contract. Jos who?

Ok, time for a couple of Thatchers me thinks, I have some now, thankfully, after a panic the other evening.

Weeks 9 and 10

Brompton Ralph – Home

Buckland St Mary – Home

Two home games on the bounce, unfortunately the game against Brompton was another victim to the weather in this frustrating season. However, the game against title chasing Buckland was worth waiting for.

As a retired off-spinner you dream of the perfect delivery, where the ball pitches, turns, bounces, which completely bamboozles the batsman and takes the top of off-stump. You know the one I mean, the Shane Warne (I know he is a leggie) delivery to Mike Gatting – shame Warne now has a broken hand, oh how I laughed.

Anyway, Saturday, Stowey’s Julian Pocock on strike, a left-handed batsman facing a right arm off-spinner, who chose to go around the wicket. The Buckland bowler was getting some purchase from the pitch and this ball to Julian was no exception, it pitched outside Julian’s leg stump, he played expecting some spin, but it got a lot of spin and it missed the defences of Julian and took the top of off-stump.

The look on Julian’s face said it all, he looked at me, looked at the pitch, looked at Carl who was umpiring at square leg, but he didn’t look at the wickets and he just walked off shaking his head, especially as he was top score from the game against Fitzhead.

I suppose that is one of the joys about umpiring, you are in the thick of it all, which takes complete concentration, but you do get to witness some great cricket from a very good vantage point.

Over the past couple of weeks I have watched loads of cricket and help officiate in some games as well. Now the good news to all you players out there I had my eyes tested last week and have new pair of specs to pick up. I know a couple of bowlers in the West Somerset League will be happy about that, but just to let you all know my eyes are in good health, and have not deteriorated in any shape or form, it’s just my glasses are scratched, so giving decisions have been a little tricky.

Over Stowey’s 1^st team have won again and Under-11’s have got off the mark with their first win over the past few weeks. It seems the trouble with the 1^st XI is they have one of the best attacks in the league, but have no batsmen to support them. For example the game against Winsford on Saturday saw them knock the home side over for just 119, but couldn’t get anywhere near the target set.

The highlight of a busy week was the Charity Cricket Weekend. This involved an open air party on the Saturday night which included a live band, disco and barbecue and six-a-side cricket on the Sunday. Luckily the weather held and enjoyable weekend was had by all, shame a couple of idiots threatened to spoil it on the Saturday evening, some of them should know better.

I must admit standing on the gate Saturday evening got a bit chilly, and I ended up wearing winter clothes by the end of the night. Different on Sunday, when the sun came out and it was a beautiful day. Shame my hay fever struck and struggled to umpire somewhat, I even had to ask players where the ball went, whether it was a six or not, but you could tell by the shot which field the ball landed in. I think Holford owes us about 20 balls, but hey some cracking shots by the young Buller’s.

Right, time for Thatchers or two me thinks, see you at The County Ground on Friday, Gloucestershire the opponents, come on Somerset, you can still qualify.

Week 8

Fitzhead – Away

I was unable to travel to Fitzhead on Saturday, which was a great disappointment to me, as I have happy memories of playing cricket there. However, this was more than compensated for as I played a game on a ground steeped in history about the game I adore.

I say I have happy memories of playing at Fitzhead as Over Stowey are usually on the wrong side of a good thumping when we play on their ground, but Stowey can take a few crumbs of comforts in previous fixtures at Fitzhead.

And when I say a few, I probably mean one, when we beat them while defending only 98. Yes a barmy sunny Saturday afternoon sometime in the 1990’s we actually won away at Fitzhead, and I think there was a blue moon that evening. Joking apart, the home side seemed pretty confident on the verge of cockiness that afternoon, especially as they were only chasing 99 to win and even more especially when they were 60-1.

Half the team was changed as they thought the top three or four batsmen would close out the game. We took a couple of quick wickets and at 73-3 the home side was still favourites. However the number five batsman, who was half changed, had to hurriedly get back in his whites then put his pads on to get on to the pitch and to bat.

Needless to say he didn’t last long, nor did the next and the next, all of which were in civvies expecting victory and had to get changed in a hurry. To say there was mass panic in the Fitzhead ranks was an understatement and Stowey eventually bowled them out for 88, ten runs short and what a victory. Serves them right and boy did we celebrate!

Another occasion I was late turning up at Fitzhead, Stowey was batting and in deep trouble. 52-5 and I was next in. I got changed into my whites, put the pads on, and as soon as I sat down the sixth wicket fell, so in I went, with their opening bowler looking menacingly at me thinking I was a walking wicket – which to be fair he would be right, but not on this occasion.

I managed to bat for 25 overs, scoring a rapid 14 - which included one six back over their opening bowler’s head, using Rocket’s bat and I told him after how to use it. Yes 14 of 25 overs, which included a 22 partnership with Steve Darch in 18 of those overs. Did the Fitzhead bowling figures look good, yes they most certainly did.

Well we did set a target of 92 and this time Fitzhead made no mistake in knocking off the runs in some 16 overs.

Ok, back to Saturday, from what I can understand from dispatches Over Stowey 2^nd XI winning streak off one came to an end on Saturday when they succumbed to a one man team, allegedly a first team regular playing in Division Five of the West Somerset League. Cannot really comment as I wasn’t there, but I do remember Fitzhead a couple of seasons ago questioning our integrity when we cancelled a home fixture because of rain. Hmmm..... me thinks a lot here about their integrity, but I am only thinking of course!

Back to where I was on Saturday, well I was paying homage to the “Cradle of Cricket” at Hambledon in Hampshire. Not only did I pay homage, I actually played on their pitch. And not only did I play I took a couple of wickets – is a comeback on I hear you ask?

In about 1750 the Men of Hambledon set up the first proper cricket club and after 20 years of its foundation the Hambledon Club became the leading cricket authority. In the 16 years from 1770 it transformed what had been a casual country pastime into a fully fledged national sport, much as we know today.

The pub opposite, the Bat and Ball Inn, served as the pavilion and clubhouse, with the legendary Richard Nyren as the landlord. The Men of Hambledon would meet there and during this time major cricket developments were agreed and new laws recorded in the minutes of the Hambledon Club. In its heyday, the Hambledon Club beat the rest of England a number of times. The foundation of the Marylebone Cricket Club (MCC) in 1787 marked the end of the Hambledon Club as an influence and 1792 the last match was played there for some 116 years.

The club, apparently, had a famous round of six toasts:

6. The Queen's mother

5. Her (His) Majesty the Queen (King)

4. The Hambledon Club

3. Cricket

2. The Immortal Memory of Madge

1. The President. 

Contemplating to bring it into Over Stowey CC at the Annual Awards night, but who is Madge? Well I know, tells you something about 18^th Century Britain me thinks. 

So yes, an emotional day, however no Thatchers, just Pimms and Lemonade instead, I think I was feeling alright. Think I may have a Thatchers now though.

Week 7

Lydeard St Lawrence – Home

Victory, yes victory for the 2^nd team with an emphatic seven wicket win, it was so comprehensive, everyone was wondering what to do, especially as it finished much earlier than usual.

So where do we start, a combination of tight bowling and fielding, forced the visitors in to some rash strokes, thus giving their wickets away. Plus, as umpire this was the first time this season I have had to give someone out, in fact I gave two LBW’s. Well if they are on the back foot, ball pitching and hitting in line of middle, they were not difficult decisions. Everyone who had a bowl got a wicket, even Greg Arlotte with is very, very slow off spin; deceived in the flight no doubt.

As for the run chase, skipper Carl got Stowey off to a flyer, calming nerves in the home dressing room, and if it wasn’t for a huge six at the end, I think extras would off top scored! As umpire I am there to over see the rules and the game is played within the spirit of cricket. I had a few mumbles that I turned down a couple of LBW decisions, but when I explained why I just hope they understand.

Stowey are now off the bottom of the league, thanks to this victory, over-taking Lydeard. I will say the visitors played the game in the right spirit, with lots of encouragement to their young contingent, a bit like most sides in Division Five.

Now, I think I have an obsession with the weather; I now even listen to the Shipping Forecast on Radio 4 long wave. Ok, it was at 5.45pm and Test Match Special was on, and they had to go to Shipping Forecast just when Matt Prior was scoring his 50. Where exactly are Dogger and German Bite?

With all the modern technology about nowadays, buying a car with a digital radio now means listening to Test Match Special is no longer a burden. The first couple of cars I bought the first thing I would look at would be the radio, if it didn’t have long wave, I wouldn’t buy it. I left some sellers a bit bemused, when I explained that the only way I could pick up TMS was on 198 long wave, the penny dropped, well I think it did!

With a hectic weekend of cricket now over, Somerset winning on both Friday and Sunday in the T20, England playing Sri Lanka in the first Test and off course Stowey 2^nd XI winning, it is pleasant to have a relaxing week without any cricket, but will be keeping a close eye on the scores from around the country.

However, the second most important thing which happened over the past seven days was Somerset going op of the County Championship, thanks to victory over Sussex. Alfonso Thomas took four wickets in four balls which helped a bit I think. Come on Somerset, make me cash in my betting slip!

Ok, that’s it for now; short a sweet, still in a state of shock that the 2^nd XI won on Saturday.

Week 6

Crowcombe III – Away

Never happened, rain overnight (so I was told), and heavy rain in the morning meant the cancellation of this fixture.

The Countryfile weather forecast for the weekend was spot on – changeable. Even the Springwatch forecast was the same; I suppose they are both supplied by the Met Office. It was so changeable the 1^st XI game was at home to Sampford Arundel was played in brilliant sunshine!

So the second XI have now officially played six games, three of which have been rained off, and the other three have a “L” in the results column. It was jokingly said that at the moment the seconds are getting more points for a rained off game than they do if they play.

So as it stands Over Stowey II’s are currently the strongest side in the whole league, making the game against Lydeard St Lawrence a massive game in the context of Division Five. One team is going to break their duck for the season and record their first win. Come on Stowey.

The blooming rain prevented Somerset recording a victory away to “Lucky” Lancashire. Third in the County Championship with a game in hand over Middlesex; just Yorkshire poking their noses in front at this stage of the season. But why can’t the mighty Set win a T20 game? Glamorgan scraped a narrow win on Friday and with Hampshire visiting the County Ground on Friday, that is now a must win game. But first a County Championship game against Sussex.

With rain coming down like steroids for most of the week my attention was drawn to the dismissal of Jos Buttler on Tuesday, in the One Day International against Sri Lanka. I was lucky to see the wicket fall, let alone any of the match thanks to the Council shutting the lane to where I live. I know it says road closed, but the lane is two miles long, so where exactly is it closed, and what access do I have to my property. A seven mile trip to go 400 yards, I despair! And do the Council reply to my emails, do the heck!

Anyway, rant over, Jos Buttler’s dismissal. He was given run out backing-up. As a qualified umpire (level 2) I first thought that Jos was not out as the Sri Lankan bowler, Senanayake, was in his delivery (if you can call it that, how bent is his arm?) stride. When the umpire gave him out I was a bit bemused and it left me scrambling for my Tom Smith’s book of umpiring – a seven mile trip.

Firstly, the bowler doesn’t have to give a warning; he can just run out the batsman if he is out of his ground backing-up. The confusion stems from the fact that the ICC playing conditions – effectively the rules under which international cricket takes place – differ from the Laws of the game as prescribed by the MCC, the ones which I have learnt.

The MCC (Law 42.15) states that “The bowler is permitted, before entering his delivery stride, to attempt to run out the non-striker.” But the ICC’s playing regulation 42.11, which replaces Law 42.15 in international cricket, states: “The bowler is permitted, before releasing the ball and provided he has not completed his usual delivery swing, to attempt to run out the non-striker.” Effectively Buttler was out, which, for me is a bit sloppy, as he had been warned and should have done something about it.

I have been involved in a similar incident some 20 years ago, when I ran out the non-striker for backing up. It was in a six-a-side tournament held in Cannington, playing against Cannington. I had noticed before I was due to bowl that a particular batsman was backing up so far down the track, in some cases about five yards that something had to be done.

When I came on to bowl my attentions were going to be ethical and warn him. However, when I bowled my first ball I deceived the striker with quality off-break, all he could do was defend it. He then made an attempt to pick up the ball and throw it back to me, when the non-striker shouted “run”, they both ran and completed a run, which to me was against the spirit of the game and then all my ethics went out of the window.

Next ball, as I started my run up, I noticed that the non-striker was already backing-up out of the popping crease; I ran in and just took off the bails. By this time the non-striker was some way down the pitch, I gave an appeal, the umpire, from Kilve, asked if the appeal was genuine, I replied in the affirmative and he gave the batsman out.

What happened next, well a lot of finger pointing, disputing, bat slinging, but I stood my ground, trying to explain that it’s in the rules, I don’t have to give a warning and I would have done, but for what happened the delivery before. The good thing about it was that my team completely backed me up, thankfully.

The guy was fuming, he eventually left the field of play and the game resumed. I believe he slung his bat from about 20 yards into the pavilion, and smashing noises were heard.  The player wouldn’t let it go, and when I was fielding on the boundary he sounded me out, came over and started “going on one” at me. Basically, I told him to get over it and check the rules. He has never spoken to me since. That incident is still spoken about to this day.

Right, time for a cider in the garden, or is it raining, oh well Thatchers on the sofa me thinks.

Week 5

Stoke St Mary II – Home

Well, it was official, before the start of play on Saturday Over Stowey 2^nd XI had moved off the bottom of the West Somerset League Division Five. Thank you rain! The bottom side was then Lydeard St Lawrence 2^nd XI, who, for some reason, had played one game less. Oh, and I promised I would mention Greg Arlotte in the first paragraph, so here you go Greg……. Greg Arlotte!

For those who watched Countryfile last Sunday you knew the forecast was going to be a lot better for the weekend, and yes Ellie was on, but no Helen. Apparently viewing figures of Countryfile have rocketed by at least 20 viewers thanks to, well you guessed it, yours truly.

Now then, a game of cricket I can officially umpire, and with no rain forecast, what could possibly go wrong. Ok, I had a barbecue the night before, where apple juice of the alcoholic kind was involved, thank you Thatchers,  so I turned up to the game on Saturday not that alert. Well it was the re-arranged barbecue from my birthday, so do you blame me?

So here is my match report from Saturday:

·         Over Stowey won the toss and elected to field. It looked like a good decision, wet wicket and all that nonsense.

·         Lee Rich broke down in his second over – do you blame him, the stance Stoke’s opening batsman took, made me as an umpire wonder WTF?

·         Greg Arlotte took his place and subsequently took a wicket with the first ball he bowled. Would like to say it pitched and turned, but it pitched and good as rolled along the ground and took the base of middle stump. Not quite a no ball, but it wasn’t the best shot I seen play.

·         Julian Pocock bowled his left arm over’s, and boy can he appeal. Can’t wait until the Ancient Mariner opens Julian, not far to walk! No while I am mentioning about Julian, Saturday was his first game of the season, and he had a bit of trouble with his kit. In fact it has been attacked by mice during the winter months. He now has an air conditioned jumper and pads!

·         The mighty seconds held a few catches, Adrian held one, only because it was of his son’s bowling never does it for anyone else.

·         Stoke scored 132-9, yes nine wickets for Stowey. Lee taking four of them, jug avoidance Lee me thinks.

·         Stowey batting – Quote: “Don’t do anything to rash, there’s plenty of time!” First ball nearly a run out, and everyone tried to hit the slowest of slow off-spinner for six, but instead they got either bowled or caught!

·         Skipper Carl, swept like a pro. He would sweep a four, the fielder would move, and subsequently sweep another four to where the fielder moved from.

·         Stowey finished 50 runs light – oh well, getting closer to a win!

·         I turned down two LBW appeals, one stumping appeal and a run out appeal. Definitely not out as the batsmen were from Stowey! Plus they were not out anyway!

·         Next week Crowcombe III away.

Now the mighty twos are still next to bottom in the league, mainly because the website hadn’t been updated. Did I tell you that Division Five is the bottom division of the West Somerset League, so being bottom is a very privileged position to be in? Not many sides will manage to achieve this throughout the season, so hey, what a side Carl has.

The mighty Somerset drew against Warwickshire in the week, thanks to the rain and managed to pick up some bonus points; however, thanks to the rain, Middlesex didn’t even manage to bowl a ball against Sussex, so the advantage they have over the might Set is shortening.

Don’t forget Somerset fans across the world they Cidermen still have a game in hand. Come on the Set, just get that T20 winning mentality back, my trip to Barbados depends on it!

Now it is time sit in the sun, in the back garden, supping Thatchers cider and listen to music! Countryfile at 7pm, Ellie, Helen etc.... Then Wednesday night, Stowey take on the Swan Inn - watch out Les Biffen!

Week 4

Hemyock – Home

What a week of cricket I have just had, some highs, and some lows and some rain! I must admit the Countryfile forecast was spot on a the previous Sunday, they said the weather will be changeable, and they couldn’t accurately forecast the end of the week, so they left it as changeable – now surely any forecaster can do that, but who am I to criticise Countryfile? 

Right, back to the highs, lows etc….. 

The highs:

• I had cricket nearly every day of the week last week.
• Somerset hammered County Champions Durham in the County Championship, lifting them to second in the Division One, with a game in hand.
• Marcus Trescothick smashed a ton in the second inning to lead the way to victory by seven wickets – despite a first baller in the first inning.

The lows:

• Somerset losing to Kent in the T20, in fact they got smashed. Well I had a few ciders to soften the blow somewhat.
• More corruption in cricket
• England all out for 99 – see above – just saying, did anyone check the colour of the batting handles when England batted? Or is it every time Ravi Bopara plays you know England are going to lose.

The rain:

• Which meant: no play fro the mighty Over Stowey 2^nd XI against Hemyock.
• Which also meant: I didn’t have to do any umpiring for the 2^nd XI again.

So four weeks of the cricket season has now passed, and I have yet to do any Saturday cricket umpiring, two games because of the rain, and the other two games I was away. Anyway, I watched Countryfile again last night, for the forecast of course, nothing to do with Ellie, and by the end of the week it is going to be “scorchio!” So Stoke St Mary, who are the visitors to Over Stowey on Saturday, you will be my first victims of the 2014 campaign.

I have now put all the fixtures in my diary for the rest of Over Stowey’s campaign, and I am gutted. There are three weekends I am unavailable, and out of the three, two games I am absolutely gutted about, Crowcombe away and Fitzhead away. Two nice away trips, two clubs’s who play the game in the right spirit, and two cracking pubs to go back after the game. Oh well, at least I have Brompton Ralph away to look forward too.

Ok, time for a Thatchers or two I think.

Week 3

Kilve – Away

Countryfile on Sunday evening is a must see programme, nothing to do with Helen Skelton, Julia Bradbury or Ellie Harrison (but they do help), it is about the weekly weather forecast at about 45 minutes in to the programme.

Why is this significant, especially in the summer? Well isn’t it obvious, it gives you an early, and accurate, indication of the likely weather for the end of the week and the weekend. In other words will the weather be ok for cricket?

This particular broadcast certainly took my eye, again nothing to do with Helen...etc. but to do with the expected heat wave coming across the country from Thursday onwards, and hopefully staying put for at least the next four months.

So as the week goes on, the forecasters gave a more accurate forecast and it looked good for Saturday, in fact the whole weekend. Good news for Stowey and Somerset.

So then a decision had to be made by myself, whether to do the trip to Kilve with the 2^nd XI, umpire part of the game and then bugger off to watch the FA Cup Final, or forget the final completely as I have a hunch that Arsenal will muck it up again and umpire the whole Kilve v Stowey game or just embrace the whole FA Cup ritual, watch FA Cup Mastermind, It’s a Knockout etc. Decisions, decisions, hmm, what to do?

The only thing nagging me was that we are over half way through May and I haven’t done a bit of umpiring so far this season. I have promised both 2^nd XI Skipper Carl and Under 15’s manager Tina I would be available to help, but so far have done absolutely nothing.

Carl even sent me a text to remind me, but to be fair he did subtly mentioned football in the text. I think I did reply, but I did have my nose stuck in the Umpire’s Bible, my new edition of Tom Smith’s. Need to be reminded in the rules now and again - I think counting to six is the hardest thing!

Cricket began in earnest on Friday, Somerset played Gloucestershire away at Bristol in their first T20 game and won. Stowey Under 11’s played North Curry away. Both of which I was unable to attend, as I went to a party on Friday somewhere in South Gloucestershire. Stowey 1^st XI were at home against Bagborough, and the 2^nd XI played Kilve away on the Saturday. And on Sunday the under 15’s were at home as well as Somerset where Surrey (Batty, Smith etc) were the visitors.

Ok, mind made up, FA Cup final on Saturday (might watch the 1^st XI for a bit), umpire the Under 15’s on Sunday and then a trip to Taunton for T20 cricket. Oh how I love the sunshine, cider and cricket. I did contemplate going to Kilve, hoping that Stowey would be batting first and thus the game could be over by kick-off. So I could still do a bit of umpiring, watch the FA Cup Final and have all day Sunday to do umpiring and watch Somerset. In other words I still hadn’t made up my mind.

So what happened was.....

Saturday:

·         Went to watch FA Cup Final Question of Sport – wasn’t on, and nor was the overhead helicopter which would normally film the teams leaving their hotel going to Wembley via the team coach .

·         Went to Stogursey May Fair – not much there.

·         Went to watch the 1^st XI for a while– not much going on there either.

·         Watched the FA Cup Final – I wished I was at Kilve, especially after the first 10 minutes.

·         Drank cider before, during and after the cup final. 

Sunday:

·         As this is about the 2^nd XI Grand Tour of the West Somerset Cricket League I was trying to find out what happened, well as Carl summed it up as an ‘unmitigated disaster’ and was somewhat reluctant to talk about it.

·         Umpired the Under 15’s – well some of it anyway

·         Went to watch Somerset – Jade Denbach is a bigger idiot than last time I wrote about him. One thing for sure he is just a bog standard County bowler and will never make the grade at International level. 

Eventually I found out what happened to the super two’s, they got hammered, Kilve batted first and hit 212-7, Stowey replied with 73 all out. Carl said that he had planned to bat first if he won the toss, and what happened, he won the toss and put Kilve in to bat. Last time he is going to do that.

However he did go on to say that the youngsters done well, Stephen Miller and Lee Rich taking five wickets between them. Apparently Stephen is a bit worried that when he bats he is turning in to a Mark Sortwell; can you bat like a snail instead, that is much faster.

Something really annoying also happened over the week; I missed an Over Stowey friendly against a Les Biffen XI on the Wednesday evening. A clue was ll the cars in the ground as I drove passed that evening, me think it was the youth playing a cup game.

So when I consulted the fixture card, which I designed and should of know there was a friendly going on, I found to my annoyance that it was the Les Biffen match, a match which usually involves cider before, during and after the game... drat and double drat!

Anyway, as a footnote, while watching Somerset in a recent home game against Nottinghamshire, I was sat with Simon Pickard and Mark Sortwell. We were talking all things cricket and we started to compare the Somerset skipper, Marcus Trescothick, with Stowey’s influential batsman, Phil Rich. We came to this conclusion:

·         They both deal only in boundaries

·         They both are reluctant to run a second

·         They are both not the fastest between the wickets

·         They both field in the slips or close in on the square

·         They are both very knowledgeable about the game

·         And they both like sausages

Oh, by the way, I missed Countryfile on Sunday, sorry Helen, Julia and Ellie, something to do with sun, cider and cricket!